August 25, 2002: Panic Mode
I'm typing this report surrounded by half packed boxes, listening as rally staffers scramble to pack the van and otherwise ready TeamStrange's decampment from the Live Oak Resort. Jennifer, Larry and the rest of the Live Oak crew have gone out of their way in every way possible to make our stay here fun and memorable. They have succeeded to such a degree that several riders have asked me not to detail the activities of yesterday evening. I am permitted only to say it was the best time that could possibly be had with one's clothes on--or off.
We had fun, but our time here is almost done. Welcome to full panic mode.
The day started out with the simple assignment of seeing the riders who did not check in yesterday through tech and check in. Even this mundane series of events took on unexpected drama as the clock counted down to the 1200 check in deadline. Some readers may recall events from the last ButtLite that culminated in what we now call the Bryce Ulrich Rule. Briefly stated, Bryce arrived after check in for no particularly good reason, and it was only the kindness of his fellow riders that allowed him to start the event at all. In order to avoid a repeat of this situation, we immediately enacted a rule: "Failure to complete check in procedures (including but not limited to mileage check, tech inspection, and completion of rally paperwork) prior to established deadlines will result in a DNS (did not start) for the rider, and will be deemed a withdrawal from the event." End of problem, or so we thought until about 11:50 this morning.
Ten minutes to close, and where was Eric? I can't answer that question, but I'm happy to report that Eric did arrive with at least 120 seconds to spare. The winner of BL5K would be on the starting grid after all. Thirty seconds later, Dave Nelson came puffing through the door, apparently having decided that a full tank of gas was worth the risk of a DNS. Another crises (narrowly) averted.
For the rest of the riders, the day didn't get interesting until just before dinner. Up to that point, riders had only the mandatory riders meeting to attend, and many used the remaining time for last minute prep work and sleep. Things perked up just before dinner, when rally flags and routesheets made their long anticipated appearance. Every rider had the opportunity to introduce themselves and offer a few words of introduction--or take a few words of good hearted abuse.
Before riders were permitted to open their routesheets, they had the opportunity to hear noted long distance rider Morris Kruempke offer some words of advice. Morris' talk lasted no more than ten minutes. Each of those minutes contained hard earned advice learned over 5 Ironbutt Rallies and countless thousands of miles: Ride safe. Take care of your body. Remain focused. Take time to sleep. Use your time at the checkpoints wisely by resting and recharging. I guarantee the winner of this event will tell you that Morris' advice played no small role in their success.
At long last, the moment of truth arrived, and bonus envelopes were quickly torn open. It was soon noted that the envelopes contained only one routesheet, labeled "Route B." Conversation soon turned from speculation over the location of the remaining routesheet(s) to discussion of the possibilities posed by Route B, to wit:
 | A gas receipt from Nuevo Laredo, Mexico worth 386 points. |
| A photo of Big Mammy's Restaurant in Natchez, Mississippi, described as
being "pretty hard to miss—unless you feel that a 28 foot tall restaurant in the shape of Aunt Jemima somehow 'blends in with the scenery'”. |
| The stalwart TeamStrange 1-2 combination of Laura Ingalls Wilder and a tasty chilito from Zanz in Mankato, MN (39 and 99 points respectively). |
Its rally time, folks.
Before long, riders pushed away from the dinner table and headed back to their rooms to review options, pace the floor, and--for the lucky ones--get some sleep. I returned to HQ and the ineffable pleasure of wrestling with recalcitrant camera software and packing too many belongings into too little space. Tomorrow comes bright and early, emphasis on the early. At 0600 its time to put the rubber to the road.
Welcome to the 2002 ButtLite, latest and greatest edition. After the riders, you've got the best seat in the house. Stay tuned.